


How to Say Goodbye

by kingdomkeeperofthelibrary



Category: The Librarians (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, But I felt it needed to be done, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Im not sure if this is fixing it or making it worse, Is this an Evlynn post-ep or my attempt to fit every one of their tag lines into one story?, MY BABIES ARE HURTING AND I NEEDED TO FIX IT, Post episode 4X06- And the Graves of Time, the world may never know
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-23 04:12:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13182123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingdomkeeperofthelibrary/pseuds/kingdomkeeperofthelibrary
Summary: She couldn’t bear to watch him turn himself into a shell over and over again. He’d come so far from that. He deserved so much more than that. And yet somehow there was always a time when she couldn’t stop it. She felt helpless; she was a Guardian; she was failing at her job. But it was more than that. He was more than just her Librarian, she more than just his Guardian. It was more than that and they both knew it and she couldn’t stop this downfall and she felt helpless.After the events of 4X06, Eve comes back to her apartment to find Flynn waiting there. She's mad at first, but she quickly learns what exactly is happening, and becomes even more devastated as she realizes there's no way for her to stop it this time.





	How to Say Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> I NEEDED TO FIX IT. 4x06 HURT AND I NEEDED TO FIX IT. FLYNN PLEASE COME HOME

“And when you’re needing your space, to do some navigating  
I’ll be here patiently waiting, to see what you find.”

* * *

 

            “What the hell are you doing here?”

It wasn’t exactly the response he had hoped for, but it was the one he expected, and certainly the one he deserved. Flynn stood in the kitchen of Eve’s apartment, and now he watched her face grow immediately angry as she came home and saw him.

“Eve,” he started.

“You think you can just pull something like that and come back here?!” Her voice was strained and tears were in her eyes.

“Eve,”

“I came waltzing into the annex all ready to go on our _bowling_ date and I had to have _Jenkins_ tell me that you and all your things were gone.”

“Eve…”

“Can you imagine how I _felt_?” she yelled. “Can you imagine what I _thought_?”

“Eve…..”

“And you didn’t even say goodbye! Usually you leave one of your stupid letters or carnations but now you just up and leave without a _word_ to me?!”

“I didn’t mean…”

“What about ‘always and forever’ Flynn?”

Flynn’s heart broke as Eve looked at him with her teary, heartbroken eyes, the eyes that he rarely saw. These were not her stormy, angry eyes that made him so revel in her beauty. These were the heartbroken, disbelieving eyes that made him feel two inches tall. And he loved her; he loved her so, so much, and somehow it all added to how nothing made sense to him right now.

“Eve you have to know this isn’t about you,” he stuttered.

“And yet somehow I always get dragged into the crossfire.” she snapped.

“I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S HAPPENING TO ME!”

Finally all the confusion and fear and anxiety that had been pent-up for weeks exploded. Finally he couldn’t take it anymore and it showed. Eve stepped back and fell silent. Her tears didn’t stop but she looked him up and down, and something changed in the way she was holding herself.

He sauntered over to her couch and sat down, and to his surprise she followed him, however slowly. There were a few moments of silence before he spoke up.

“I don’t know what’s happening to me.” he said again, his own voice cracking now. “I just…I know I love The Library and I know I wanna be there but somehow it can’t all connect. No matter how sure I am of myself all I can hear is what Nicole kept saying to me, or the things that Darington said, and then I think about how much I love you and how much I love the other Librarians and….Im just confused and I don’t know why.”

“Flynn please don’t do this to yourself.” Eve said. “Let us help you. You _know_ we can.”

Flynn looked down at the floor and sniffed away tears. He could hardly bear to meet Eve’s eyes. It hurt too much to. It reminded him immediately how much he loved her, and how guilty he was feeling for doing all this, and it all just added to the confusion and the crazy and the thousand voices in his head all going to war with each-other.

“I just can’t make sense of anything right now.” he muttered.

Eve said nothing, and Flynn finally looked up, and there were her gentle eyes, looking at him with concern rather than anger. And then he couldn’t help it anymore. No matter how much he’d told himself he couldn’t do this, despite the fact that he’d initially not said goodbye just for this reason, he couldn’t take it anymore. He burst into tears, and he fell apart.

“I’m just scared Eve.” he cried. “I don’t like what I’m feeling and I’m scared.”

Eve waited a moment, seemingly hesitant, but then leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him. As her embrace tightened around him his tears grew in intensity, and his body shook with the paralyzing feeling of falling apart.

“Flynn you should’ve just talked to me.” Eve insisted.

“I was afraid of hurting you.” he admitted, breaking apart from her. “And I knew you’d say all the things I needed to hear and I was…I was afraid of hearing them. Somehow hearing people tell me what I know is the answer is just making me more confused.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going through any of this before?”

Her hand found its way to his knee, and despite everything he made no move to remove it.

“Because I didn’t want to admit it.”  he said straightly, not meeting her gaze again. “Admitting it made it real.”

“And yet you didn’t and now here we are.” There was anger returning to her voice again, and yet it was still softer than before.

Once again feelings of guilt rose to the surface as he thought about how much he didn’t deserve her, how much his stupid head made him hurt her over and over again. Why was she still being so loving with him? Why hadn’t she thrown him out the very second she’d seen he was there? Why couldn’t he just feel okay to take her hand and go to bed and go to the Library in the morning and forget any of this had ever happened?

“Eve I’m so sorry,” he sniffed. “I’m so sorry Eve, you don’t deserve this, you don’t deserve any of this.”

“Hey don’t talk like that.” she said, leaning closer to him. “We don’t talk to each-other that way: not anymore.”

Flynn said nothing, which only heightened Eve’s worry. This wasn’t like him. He ran sure, but to give up completely? Something was wrong, something she was afraid she wouldn’t be able to fix. She moved her hand to his shoulder and replaced its place on his leg with her other, so that they were connected in every way.

“Flynn don’t do this.” she pleaded. “Come home. You know the Library is your home you’re letting your overthinking get in the way. Come home and we’ll get through this together, I promise.”

Eve didn’t want to, but she’d started to cry again. She couldn’t help it. She couldn’t bear to watch him turn himself into a shell over and over again. He’d come so far from that. He deserved so much more than that. And yet somehow there was always a time when she couldn’t stop it. She felt helpless; she was a Guardian; she was failing at her job. But it was more than that. He was more than just her Librarian, she more than just his Guardian. It was more than that and they both knew it and she couldn’t stop this downfall and she felt helpless.

“I really think I just…I just need some time.” Flynn muttered. “I don’t think I’m ever going to figure it out unless I leave for a little while.”

“Well then I guess there’s nothing I can say to stop you.” Eve gulped.

“Honey I wish there was.”

Eve took a deep breath, shaking off the pain, and grabbed both of his hands in hers.

“Go find what it is you need to find Flynn,” she said, holding back tears. “And then find your way back home.”

“Why are you still doing all this?” Flynn stuttered. “Why are you being so good to me? Why aren’t you mad?”

“Because I’m not mad Flynn; I’m hurt.” Eve said plainly. “I’m hurt to be losing you, and I’m hurt to see you doing this to yourself. But you don’t give up on family. I know this isn’t you. I’m not giving up on you.”

“How are you so wonderful?” Flynn asked, shaking his head.

“Because once upon a time I met a Librarian who told me that we eat the impossible for breakfast every day,” Eve smiled, her eyes tearing again. “And he taught me that anything’s possible.”

“Go finish your mission Flynn.” Eve said, squeezing his hand. “But when you’re done come back home to me. Come back home to us.”

Flynn stared at her now, and as their eyes were locked on each-other, she reached into her pocket and discreetly slid something into his hand. She couldn’t beat his observance though, because he flinched immediately and looked down at what she’d given him.

“Eve…” he stuttered.

“Take it,” she said, picking up the tethering ring she’d given back to him. “Keep it as a reminder of what you need to come home to. But more so as a reminder that I love you: Always and Forever.”

As she said the words she slipped the ring onto Flynn’s left hand ring-finger, and her own hand trembled as she realized what it meant. But they were both ready for this, had been for longer than they’d known, and, as much as the whole concept confused her, she suddenly understood that she wasn’t afraid anymore.

Flynn looked at her for a moment, then suddenly grabbed her chin and pulled her into a deep kiss. Eve trembled, but soon melted. She could never hate this. She could never not want this. She loved him so much.

They parted and their foreheads stayed touching, as they sat in silence for a few moments and just breathed. They’d been through so much together. Already, without any kind of magical ceremony, it was like they were one person, two parts of one whole. Touching like this felt like connecting to their other half. And immediately it felt impossible to part.

“You’re making me want to stay,” Flynn whispered.

“Then stay.” Eve whispered back.

“I think we both know I need to go.”

Slowly, they pulled apart, and they stood up before Eve followed Flynn to the door. She faced him now, and they both froze as they realized this was it: this was the final moment.

“So I guess this is goodbye.” Flynn said weakly.

“Not goodbye,” Eve cried. She cocked her head with a smile. “It’s just…’farewell for now’.”

“Eve…”

“Don’t…..say anything else. Just go finish your mission. And then come home.”

Flynn nodded.

“And if you ever need a little piece of comfort while you’re finding what you need to you know you can always come right back here,”

Flynn didn’t have the chance to say anything before Eve rushed forward and wrapped her arms around him, instantly burying her head in his shoulder. It took him a second, but his arm tightened around her waist, and he rested his chin on her shoulder. He let his other hand come and caress her hair, soaking in the last bit of memory he’d have for a while. He breathed deep and smelt her favorite perfume, and her apple shampoo that he loved to soak in, burying his face in her hair after a shower. She smelt like home. And he hated that his life had come to this, that is mind had taken him to his place, that he needed to leave her to move forward.

He knew that if he stayed there another second that he’d drop everything and grab her and never let go. He’d run right back onto that couch and he’d sit her down and he’d wrap his arm around her, and he’d go back to work with her in the morning, and then he’d just be confused again. And he’d hurt her. He needed to go.

And so he lifted his arms away and pulled back from the embrace. She grabbed his hand as they separated, and he gave it a final squeeze before walking backwards toward the door and slowly letting it go. He never took his eyes off her this way, until he was outside, and the door was closed.

Once he was gone, Eve stared at the blank colored doorway that he’d been in front of seconds ago. His scent of old-books and chalk and cologne still hung in her nose, and she could still feel his lips on hers. She smiled in spite of herself and let out a tiny cry.

“Come back alive Flynn.”

**Author's Note:**

> In retrospect idk if I "fixed it" or made it worse, but I hope you enjoyed! I just thought they deserved a proper goodbye. I knew I couldn't have him stay and match canon, but I also wanted a way to have him leave with a goodbye without them fighting. It ended up working really well and fitting in with Eve's character, and I just started playing with this idea that Eve is not going to give up on him, which I hope we'll see in the show. 
> 
> As much as this arc hurts I'm loving it and can't wait to see where it takes Flynn! I have lots of ideas and might write a bunch of these in the coming weeks. Until then, thanks for all your love and support as always. Stay magical and I'll see you soon!


End file.
